memorable moments this 2013 :D

Just like last year, I'm going to list down my 10 most memorable moments for this year. I'd say this year was awesome, probably better than last year. I've been good and bad, happy and sad, but in the end, all the experience was worth it :D


10. April 8, 2013 
     This day was the roller coaster of the year. Haha. I remember clearly how my day started so bad because of my problem, and I still had a final exam later in the morning. I can't really say what exactly happened, but it was hell. I hope I won't go through that again next year.
      Later that day (some time in the afternoon), my soon-to-be boyfriend in a few minutes visited me, and he made everything better by asking me to be his girlfriend. I've liked him for some time then, so it was quite easy to say yes. :) He had a few presents for me, including a chocolate so melted because of the summer heat. Haha. I appreciated his presents a lot. And all my anxiety during the morning was gone. :)

9. Christmas eve
     It was the first time we spent Christmas eve away from home. We went to our relative's home and we get to spend it there together. There was a photo booth and a lot of pictures were taken, and my cousins and I enjoyed it so much. Haha. There were lots of drinks and foods and stories as well. It was actually nice to spend Christmas eve this way. :)

8. Acads
     This had it's ups and downs, but, during the latter part of the year, this was the better part. Don't get me wrong, I love learning new stuff and I'm not all that high and mighty when it comes to academics, but finally feeling industrious again this second semester feels good. Maybe because I'm learning all new stuff from my major, and it's interesting. :)
     Also, the last part of the first semester was quite fun despite all those loads of schoolwork and projects. It was awesome brainstorming and getting to work with my brilliant classmates/groupmates. The downside is I really missed proper sleep. A LOT. :---)

7. Opening up to more music
     Because of my bf and twitter friends, I got the chance to listen to a lot of new and cool stuff from different bands and artists. I can't find any other words to say about this but I'm definitely glad that my iTunes contains over a thousand songs.

6. Hangout with HS friends last sembreak
     Well, at least we get to meet at least once every year. There were almost 20 of us who gathered and just enjoyed each other's company. It was a very fun hang out. We ate at Shakey's, strolled inside the mall then played at Quantum. Of course, we exchanged a lot of stories since we need a lot of catching up to do. :)

5. Meeting BForce and other fangirl friends (haha)
     Well honestly, I love BForce to bits and they just make me so happy. Haha. We all have something in common (hey, Mr. Jack Barakat) plus everyone's got their own sense of humor. Ily gurls.
     And to everyone else who helped me get to where I am... (what!?)
     And for every fangirl/boy I have met over the internet, damn, they're awesome. Stay awesome and hope I to see some of them on other concerts :)
     This also goes out to my elbi fangirl friends. You know who you are :--)

4. When Jack Barakat replied to my tweet
     Oh come on, who wouldn't be overly delighted to have Jack reply a full sentence to you?? Sorry but I'm just so happy okay. It's okay for a girl to be happy about this kind of things. ;D
See Jack's tweet here :D :D :D

3. Paramore concert (February 15, 2013)
     I missed them last 2010, but not this time. :D Hearing one of my all time favorite band live was really an amazing moment. Hayley's voice is just so perfect, the whole band is perfect, not to mention I'm surrounded by tens of thousands of people loving the same music as I do. 
And nope. I will not get a Gen Ad seat again because fuck vertigo.

2. Bazooka Rocks weekend (August 24-25,2013)
     BEST. WEEKEND. EVER. Met and hugged my fave bands especially Tonight Alive and All Time Low. I freakin' hugged them!!!! *fangirl moment* And of course, that wouldn't be possible without those hundreds of people whom I bothered and nagged to vote for my entry on MOA's contest for that M&G. To all of those people, I send you all my love and my deepest gratitude :-)
     Of course, the concert itself was rad!!!! 14 hours of awesome live music from more than 10 different bands, being surrounded by people who have the same passion and love for music as I do, and seeing my fave bands next to the person I love is beyond perfect. Plus, booze and foods and random booths is more than I could ask for. It was the best 3k something I've ever spent, and it was definitely well-spent!

1. P :-)
     We started the year together (well, we still weren't together at the start of the year but you get the idea) and I'm glad we're ending it together, as well. I honestly don't know what I'd be, or where I'd be if he wouldn't be in my life right now. He's the best thing that ever happened to me this year. He's my Jack Barakat, my best friend, my concert buddy, my pillow and the love of my life. I don't wanna get cheesy anymore so I'll just say that I really love him. :-)
Well, that's one to cross off this list :-)


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I really want to thank God for giving me such a great year, a lot of experiences and a good boyfriend. I wanna thank my family and all my friends, because heck, my 2013 would be incomplete without you. I also wanna thank bands for existing and creating music. I wanna thank whoever created twitter because I made quite some friends over twitter, ya know. Well, going back to the topic, I know every good and bad thing that I encountered this year only adds up to my list of awesome experience. :-)

why me

Why do I push away someone who likes me? Why does he like me, anyway? First off, I am not really romantically likeable. I don't have the physical qualities wherein a guy should be attracted to. I am not that pretty nor have the best attitude. I act like a bitch sometimes, and I can get mean, too. Maybe you're wondering why am I focusing on my negative sides rather than the positive ones. Well, those are easier to point out. Next, when someone tells me they like me, I just don't want to believe them anymore. This is because of the first reason, and also because guys are jerks. They let you believe that they like you, then after some time, they're gonna tell you that they were not that serious about it or they just disappear and never have connections with you again. Seriously, I could make a list of guys who did that to me under those two classifications. And during those moments, I am always on the losing end because I believed them. Haha. Stupid. So yeah, I don't know why I made this post. I guess I just want to say these things.

i remember all the feelings and the day they stopped

He was someone I never expected to like, nor fall in "love" with. It just all happened so suddenly when he held my hand and then sparks flew. 

Prior to that, we were just friends/classmates. Then on that day, we were huddled in a circle with other friends and reviewing for an exam. We were seated next to each other, our hands brushing a little whenever a slight movement was done. I do not know if that was intentional (by him) or what, but anyway, we ended up holding each other's hands. If my memory doesn't fail me, it was him who initiated it. Of course, as a thirteen-year-old, I was kind of surprised, especially because he was the first guy to hold my hand. 

After that incident, we started to become closer friends. He would always sit beside me during breaks and hold hands and do cheesy stuffs. We never kissed, though he kissed me once on the head, and that was it. At that moment, I could say that I "love" him, and vice versa. But damn, we were both thirteen-year-olds, okay? And I didn't consider him as my boyfriend because there was no really formalities among that. Maybe I should ask him now that we are older. Haha. Anyway, all of those things happen a few weeks before the end of classes. And the bad news is, he is going to leave the country during the summer; they were migrating somewhere in Europe. 

We tried to keep in contact while he was on the other side of the world. We chat regularly, he even called me during his first days there. Then, as time passes by, we slowly slipped away; chatting less, talking less. This went on for a few months, we would rarely talk and if we did, it was just casual hello's and how are you's. It was just so sad.

A year after our little holding hands incident, we decided to stop whatever we have and whatever we are doing; just releasing each other from the commitments we have (if he even considered that as a commitment). So yeah, like normal teenagers, I felt broken. Ha ha. I went on like that for a few months...until I met the guy who later became my first true boyfriend. LOL.

Now, looking back at this story, I could say that that was puppy love. It was some kind of love that young teenagers would want to engage in just to feel what it feels like to have some sort of boyfriend (or girlfriend, for boys... or not. IFYKWIM).

"I remember all the feelings and the day they stopped" (Innocent by Our Lady Peace) 
Sure, up until now, I still remember how those felt. How holding his hand felt, how my head on his shoulders felt, how flirt texting him felt like, how we listen to our favorite songs felt, how I felt coping up when he left the country, how chatting with him after a long time felt, and of course, how heartbroken I felt when we decided it was over. I don't regret feeling these things, in fact, I am happy that I felt all of these. It is a part of me and it makes up who I am. Anyway, all the feelings that I have for him gradually stopped when I started being friends with the guy who later became my boyfriend. :P 

To e, I do hope you are happy now. And I very much like to meet up with you when you get back here and talk about how silly we were back then. I do not feel any romantic feelings for you anymore, but you know, I still care. :)

PS. The lyrics of that song by OLP kinda fits the story, but the actual song doesn't. The song tells a completely different story. Listen to it, it's good. Innocent by Our Lady Peace. :)

wills, shoulds and musts for 2013 :)

I am making this list so I could be reminded of the things to do this year :)

1. I must study harder. Always the first one.

2. I must pass all my subjets for the year. Go, go, go. :D

3. I must watch Paramore's concert on February 15. MUST.

4. I should learn how to drive.

5. I should learn how to play the bass or drums.

6. I will make more covers of random songs. LOL.

7. I will listen to new bands.
8. I must fix my iTunes -.-
9. I will sleep early... naaat. jk :))
10. I will try to find a boyfriend. LOL.
11. I should watch Pierce the Veil/Sleeping with Sirens show on February 16. :)
12. I should also watch Smash Project on March 8... kung may matitira pang pera. XD
13. I will try to join an organization... pag sinipag. 
14. I must write notes about good things that happens to me this year :)
15. I should save money. The least I could save every week is Php200. 
16. I will try to exercise as much as possible :)
17. I must make my requirements ahead of time as much as possible.
18. I will lessen my gala and tambay but still maintain friendships and connections :D
19. I will try to listen to a certain radio station every night.
20. I will ask him for a movie date...again. :D
21. I must say YES to new things (of course, things that would not put me on harm lol)


This list will probably be for my happiness. :D I know there are still lots of things I want to do, but I just couldn't write them down right now. :P

memorable moments this 2012 :D

Since 2012 is ending, I just want to recall the 10 most memorable moments I had this year :D

10. That one day with d.

     Some time during the sembreak, I went out with d to elbi. Just as friends. Hang out lang naman saka nagcheck ng grades. Kuntento na ko sa ganon kami. I’m happy na we’re friends and moments like these are just so cute. :)

9. Swimming last May with high school classmates

     Fun fun fun dahil bonding to with high school classmates tapos overnight swimming pa. Just a little get-together in the middle of the year :D

8. Nung panahong halos na-exempt ako sa lahat ng final exams.

     Nung 1^st sem AY 2012-2013 ‘to. Sorry kung medyo mayabang ang dating pero I am proud of my achievements. Chos. I know I did my best on those subjects, and obviously, nag-pay off naman yung efforts ko dahil yung mga subjects na may exemption for finals ay naexempt ako. I satisfied the requirements for exemption kaya ganon. Haha. Isang subject lang ako hindi na-exempt and I just needed 0.01 in my grade para maexempt. You do not know how pissed I was with that. Hahaha.

7. Girls’ night out with VGmates.

     This happened last March as a sem-ender for us VGmates. We attended worship night (really feels good to thank God for all the blessings we had that semester :D)then had an overnight at our VGmates’ apartment. There were surprise cakes for the birthday celebrants for the past months(kasama ako haha) tapos movie marathon lang. I remember that night, muntik na ko magremovals sa onse non dahil ang final grade ko sa onse ay 60 point something na lang. Wewwww. Anywaaay, that night was so fun :)

6. 3 days straight of bonding with friends.

     Ngayong Christmas break lang ‘to. First day was with high school classmates. Birthday kasi ng isa naming classmate so we went to his house to have some videoke time and eaaaat! Haha. It was craaaazy and so fun :D Second day was with close friends. My friend and I made a cover of a Selena Gomez song for her project and my other two friends helped in recording it. It was awesome :) Third day was with more friends and gala-gala lang yon sa SM. Chill lang, still fun though haha. Take note, my bestfriend was also present on those 3  days. XD

5. Meeting the most awesome person I have ever met (so far)

     Hahaha. He really is awesome. I have mentioned him somewhere in my blog… I think. XD Di ko alam kung anong mangyayari sa 2012 ko kung di ko siya nakilala at naging kaibigan :)

4. That moment with that person at number 5.

     Those moments pala dapat. Haha. To the future me who will read this, you know what those moments are :)

3. My 18^th birthday celebration.

     Awesome party with the most awesome people ever. :) Kahit may exam ako kinabukasan after non, gora laaaang! Haha.

2. Watched Hunger Games with a special person.

     Sobraaaang… uhm, kilig and happiness lang ang nafeel ko non :”> I really like him, and yon, again, to the future me who might read this, remember that moment and all the feelings please. :D Sobrang special lang nung moment na yon anddd. ermegerd. hihi

1. The Cab live at ATC!

     SEPT. 22, 2012. BEST. MOMENT. OF. MY. LIFE. The feeeels hahaha! It’s really great to see your favorite band playing your favorite songs. <3 Really. Perfect moment. I was with my close friend and we both enjoyed the show!!! :D

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And with that, I do want to thank God for all the wonderful things that happened to me this year, both the good and the bad ones. I know that by these experiences, I am becoming a better person and a person that I want to be. And also, I would like to thank my friends and family for being with me this year <3 Mga sponsors ng buhay ko. :) Hahaha. Hope to have a fun 2013. :D

so you have a boyfriend now

This is an obligatory post just to keep my blog updated. So... what shall I talk about? :) 

Oh, I have an interesting topic here. How about we talk about your girl friend who now has a boyfriend and have been almost ignoring you since then? :D Yeah, those kind of people are annoying. Sure, you do have a lot of other friends and I was just one close friend you have for more than a year or so... Oh, please, it's alright to ignore me then take me by surprise that you now have a boyfriend. Well, that explains a lot. Call me jealous but I really don't think that is a good reason to ignore your friends. You do know boyfriends don't last. Only 20% of the girls find the right guy for them at this age. And you, you may or may not belong to that 20%. And if you don't, where would your friends whom you ignored be now, huh? Would you find them again? Would they still be there for you, or perhaps, is it their turn to ignore you now? >:) Ha. Kidding. Just so you know, there are people out there who can balance their time with their friends and their lover. I just hope you can still become one of them.

11/15

We were lying in bed, facing each other, just sharing stories. Then, I whispered to him, "I miss you." He just looked at me, and I know that look; pitiful, hopeful, sad. He whispered something back. He whispered a lot of things that I wasn't able to catch all of it. He spoke, then, in his normal voice. He read to me some quote from his phone and said that someday, I would find the right guy for me, that I was pretty and good enough to find another man. He told me that yes, he do have regrets, but that was all in the past now. Then comes the awkward silence. He spoke again and said that there was one thing he wanted to do but he never got the chance to. I asked him what was it. I waited for his response, then he kissed me on the lips. It was short, around 2 seconds. But on that 2 seconds came the rush of emotions; happiness, nostalgia, but mostly, it was pain. This was the most painful kiss ever, emotionally speaking. After that brief kiss, I turned my back on him, trying not to cry, and he just hugged me from behind. 
Then, I woke up from this painful dream. 

10 things I would like to do with THAT guy :)

1. (and will always be my number 1.) Watch concerts by our favorite band/artist. :) -- Call me weird, but i do find this very sweet and romantic. Haha.

2. Do a TV series or movie marathon. -- This may seem to be a lazy activity but it's nice to just sit out, chill and watch something together (whether comedy or horror or what).

3. Study. -- Yes, this maybe, perhaps, too nerdy. But, it is our responsibility to maintain good grades while engaging in a relationship.

4. Shopping. -- Guys who would go shopping with you/guys who actually go shopping is definitely worth keeping.

5. Tell stories. -- An exchange of random stories, information, what happened when, and etc. whether personally or through text. LOL. Moreover, I would love to know how his day went, and hopefully, vice versa.

6. Play games or sports. -- Not only it would keep us healthy (and our relationship, too), we all know playing games and sports is always fun. :D

7. Share music. -- It's good that we could just listen to music together and hang-out. We could also exchange some new stuff that we have listened to... anyway, it's music (which we should both love :P)

8. Eat. -- Preferably something he cooked :D Or we could go out and try new food and restaurants, or just go to our usual favorite and enjoy the pleasures of eating :D

9. Do silly things. -- Being random can be fun and crazy. And that's how I want us to be. I want to be surprised with what we could both do. 

10. Pray. -- This could be the last, but definitely not the least. A relationship that honors God is the one of the best relationships you can have :)

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After around a week of drafting and thinking how to express these thoughts, I finally came up with this :) (this can also be found on my tumblr page)