choices

I am writing this in the middle of the week, and in the middle of the day because A) I am very confused, and B) I am pissed off. Let's start with reason A.
I am very confused 'cause there are so many options that I am having a hard time choosing one. There are too many paths ahead of me and I cannot choose which one to take. Let's see... here are the options:
1. Church.
2. Join org A.
3. Join org B.
4. Music. ♥
5. Paka-adik sa acads.
6. As is. (flirting, sitting around -- which are kind of getting boring)
I'm guessing I need to choose at least one among the first four 'cause my depression isn't getting any better. I need distractions. I feel like if I don't do something before the year ends, I might as well go. LOL. Kidding. This freakin' depression is almost headed towards that. I need to be saved. But anyway, that isn't the point of this post. I just want to do something worthwhile, yung tipong worth it naman ang pag-eexist ko. IDK. I'm just confused that I do not know what I am saying.
Next off, I am pissed off. People are leaving me behind. People do NOT leave me behind. I should be the one leaving them. :P But yeah, it IS happening. And it is pissing me off. So much. Truth is, I hate solitude. It brings up the depression. Depression easily eats me up whenever I am alone. So yeah, as of now, my solution is just flirting and watching some series. But we all know that would not last long. I need some kind of a long term solution. This is how this reason is related to the first one.  
Screw everybody. 
:(

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I am currently in music therapy. Yeah, I'm playing those loud rock songs. They deal with all the frustration and anger and whatever you call these feelings I feel right now.